Archive for the ‘Current Events’ Category

3-4-2013 12-44-33 PM

Say what you want about the Liberals and their anti-gun crusade.  We have more than politics to worry about here folks!

I want you to ignore the fact that I am wearing a hat made of tinfoil.. and try to focus on what I’m saying … Something HUGE is coming our way.. and I’m not talking about an Asteroid.

I am talking about ZOMBIES… Yes.. slow moving, dumb as a bag of doorknobs, flesh-eating Zombies.

Don’t believe me.. well just turn on your TV or pay attention to the internets.. Let me bulletize it for you:

  1. The Catholic Church has no leader:  Um.. Pope dude.. you can’t just resign.. unless of course.. you have been bitten by a Zombie and need to go under ground
  2. Giant Asteroid passes near earth: So what.. the Earth has been hit before and keeps on keepin on.. this was just a left-wing distraction (more on that later)
  3. Meteorite crashes into Russia:  Also BS .. this was just IRAN trying to launch another satellite.. they really are bad at that
  4. The Department of Homeland Defense is stockpiling bullets and light armored vehicles: Why?? Yup.. you guessed it.. we need to be ready for the outbreak!
  5. Gun-Control: There is a sub-plot here too.. I think the major push on gun-control is because the Zombies have already begun to take over and the Liberals want to harness a way to count their votes!

I could go on.. but I will spare you.. because you don’t have time to be reading this shit.. you need to go out NOW.. and get a gun… if you can’t get one now.. then practice by shaping your pop-tarts into a gun and keep yourself focused!

I don’t know about you people.. but to prepare I am doing a number of things (besides stockpiling guns and bullets).  At the very least you should all be watching The Walking Dead (on AMC Sunday nights) and read the book “World War Z“….

Don’t say I didn’t warn you